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Founder/Full Stack
Databased God
Sleep Researcher
VP of Baltic Sales
The only thing more extreme than his work ethic is his relax ethic. Etnik believes in laziness as a pillar of computer science; allowing him to create highly efficient methods for simplifying workflows, optimizing sales volume and exacerbating unemployment. He also fails to understand why anyone would toss out a perfectly good Toblerone just because it’s covered in wasps.
Director of Client Experience
Frank Luntz Fangirl
All my Ex’s Live in Tech Sauce
Full Tower
When Ryan enters a room it’s like turning on an MRI machine at a body mod convention. Clients are frequently wowed by both his genuine concern and practical insight into the human condition. While comparisons to certain Austrian psychoanalysts are apt, he remains adamant that incest is a completely inappropriate topic for the server room.
Founder/Frontend
Seamus Heinous
Humanist
Serious Man
Max is pretty tall in flats, but very tall in heels, and practices unlicensed dentistry in a basement in Gowanus. He believes in effective, unpretentious design, mostly to distract from his own pretentiousness.
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